I just found out that I could download sermons preached at the church that I regularly visit. Here it is and I hope you’ll find it useful. http://coign.org/resources/sermons

The message delivered last week was inspirational and it is applicable in our daily lives. The message was “Preparing the Project” and is pertinent to whatever plans or projects that you are or about to be accountable in life. This tells us that Christianity is not just about glorifying the Lord but it is also about planning which the Bible is able to guide us. The bible is inspirational, instructional, contains good practise and full of common sense. These are the guidelines when preparing for a task that I’ve gathered from the sermon. 

1. Research things really well and thoroughly.

2. Persist and learn from others.

3. Overcome disappointment. Failures cannot be avoided due to tests, challenges and also intrusion from the devil. Obey Him despite the mess in life and leave the consequences with him. Trust God, be patient, move with faith and not with fear and he will sort the rest out. In the end, we will know that God cares for us and also the rest who have suffered the consequences with us. Only challenges will mould us into stronger individuals. 

4. Don’t be put off by others’ failures. Everything can be rebuild in His power.

5. Keep believing there is a solution.

If you feel lost, I hope this would be encouraging. I personally believe that without my unfailing faith in Him, I wouldn’t have cope well this far  - mel.

Finally, I’m ready to share. What has been holding me back for so many years apart from just sharing with really closed friends? Well, I think I just couldn’t get over it and the fear of how others might react. Besides, I respected the fact that my parents were quite “pantang” about letting others know that I had critical illness.

This happened way back in 2000, before I got married. I’d never done blood test prior to then and thank God for Eng who insisted I had a thorough health checkup. I did a CA125, which is an ovarian tumour marker test and the result indicated that my marker was above the range. That horrified me straight away and I was recommended to undergo an ultrasound. Being at that young tender age, I had no idea what to expect. The ultrasound showed that I had a big cyst, measured 11cm in diameter on my left ovary. No second thoughts about getting it removed soonest possible. Basically I had no choice because the cyst contained a white substance, which could be cancerous, and once that spreads or the capsule breaches, it would infect other areas. I was trying to recall if I had other symptoms that could be related to the cyst. I did have a couple of warning signs, which I hastily ignored. I did have night fevers, sharp pain on the lower back, diarrhea and hard bloated tummy for a couple of months. My endurance level of pain must be pretty high then in other to disregard those entire ordeals.

2 days later, I underwent an hour surgery and it was hours later before I recovered from the effect of anesthetic. The first voice I heard and the face I saw was Eng who was with me all the time. The surgery went well and I had my left ovary removed. Unfortunately, the biopsy result of the cyst was unpleasant. The diagnosis reported Serous Papillary Cystadenocarcinoma, in layman’s term, ovarian cancer stage 1a, which was confined to the ovary. The treatment did not end with the surgery as I had to undergo CT scan and other scans regularly to ensure the malignancy did not spread. God spared me by not letting the matter worsen and since the cells were not detected in any other areas, I did not have to undergo chemotherapy.

It was a wakeup call for Eng and myself as that drove us to be more health conscious and respond to any repulsive body signals. I’m still monitoring my health by going for bi-yearly ultrasounds and full blood test. It is invaluable and I urge all my lady friends to do the same. Whenever I hear of someone going through the same trauma, I feel upset for the person and angry with myself for not sharing in advance. So I hope that with this, it would be treated as a lesson and a newfound knowledge to be responsible for your own health. Blood test is essential and never forget to include CA125. Besides, get a comprehensive insurance cover that includes critical illness and hospitalization. Money is the last thing you would want to worry about when there are more life-battling issues.

We couldn’t thank God for more as with just 1 ovary, I managed to conceive without many problems. This episode of our life really means a lot to us and I just hope that no one would ever need to go through my past experience ever - mel

1. Work in own comfortable environment.

2. Able to obtain more concentration and focus (That is if you are confined to your own space with no external disturbance). When I visited a MNC in Redmond last year, every developer has his/her own room because the employer believes that they need silence and own space to think as they hardly need to interact with each other. To me that’s no difference from working at home.

3. Save time on commuting particularly if you need to go through massive traffic (in KL especially on rainy days! Indirectly, you get more sleep too! And that would indirectly help the government to counter the traffic problem in the city)

4. Save costs on commuting (the heightened petrol prices just won’t get you anywhere as it will continue to raise) and meals and probably office attire since you do not need to dress up 5 days a week. Only startup and ongoing investment is on telephone and broadband connections and probably some necessary devices like printers but the accumulated expenditure is still cheaper than the daily expenses if you were to work in the office.

5. Self-managing and maximize flexibility as well as productivity in own way.

6. Nurture self-discipline as opposed to perception of laziness (it’s all in the mind!).

7. Develop mutual trust and respect between employer and employee. I never like anyone breathing down my neck, so respect is significant to me.

8. With reference to that, employee tends to be more willing to work at any time during critical needs. Of course that rarely happens but even if it does, employee won’t feel stressed or upset about the request.

9. Extremely advantageous to working mothers as they can also focus on the upbringing of the young children at the same time. Again it is self-managing and mitigates the need to employ a baby-sitter thus save costs! Anything that is good for the family is good for the country’s future. Children are the country’s future generation. If only Malaysia government and the private sectors could be more broadminded and liberal to realize that in the long run (longer maternity leave please! 2 months is pathetic! In UK, the government is making the effort to extend the ordinary maternity leave to 9 months from mid 2007..aarrghh I’ll miss the boat).

10. In some cultures, it would cut down unnecessary time wasted on socializing, long lunches and teh-tarik sessions coz those would chew up most of the precious working time. That would result in overtime if tasks do not get completed by end of the day.

And the list goes on……What matters is the job gets done within expectation and what more can you say, if either way produces the same result. But many wonder what and how do you work from home. That’s because it doesn’t apply to every profession. If you need to work with counterparts face to face, no doubt you need to be on site. However, technology is so advanced these days that you can access the company’s network seamlessly off-site and you can have netmeetings, teleconferencing and videoconfering anytime anywhere. So why not seize the opportunity by fully utilizing the available feature? If Malaysia wants to be a well known MSC hub, it’s not the setup of physical organizations in Cyberjaya that counts but what should improvise and grow is also the cultural working mindset. I’m not saying that every company in the UK allows the employees to work from home as there are still some conservative ones in this developed nation. If you are already enjoying the heavenly benefits, it would be a tough challenge trying to find the next job in another organization that can meet equivalent anticipation. I believe money isn’t the sole factor nor would it supersede other requirements all the time – mel.

This is my version of the dish; without dried chillies and oyster sauce. Well, I never use oyster sauce or MSG in my cooking coz it’s unhealthy. That’s why it tastes different from the famous "Kung Pao Chicken" at Esquires Kitchen, KL. oohhhh I do miss it though. Anyway, I made an unconscious move towards the end of cooking. I intended to turn off the fire but instead turned it on full blaze. While it was left boiling, I did some washing for 1-2 minutes. When I returned to the pan, I realized what I had done and quickly shut the fire. Fortunately it was not burned but instead, the high temperature brought out the aroma and taste of the cashew nuts in the chicken. Eng loved it! Should I have done according to my original plan, the dish would not have tasted the same.
So I guess it’s the same in life. Not trying to be philosophical but isn’t it true that some inadvertent decisions or actions are meant to prove something right or better? Not all “mistakes” bring agony in life, so we should look forward positively if things happened unplanned. In fact, some adhoc verdicts might even prove to be more prolific as human plans might not turn out right all the time. At the end of the day, I somehow believe that certain incidents are meant to be and planned in advance by the good Lord  – mel.

Blink of an eye, it’s that time of the year again.

It was the same season last year when both Eng and I entered the UK together (though Eng was here much earlier than me).

It was the season when we both were so busy with business travels and at the same time had to cope with relocation matters.

It was the season when we had to look for a permanent residential location in less than a month (I was lucky as Eng did most of the findings as I was traveling).  

It was the season when we arrived quite empty handed whilst we waited for our 40 packs shipment to arrive from KL.  

It was the season when I was trying to adjust to the hot weather in Bangalore and cold weather in UK on alternate weeks till I developed some skin rash that impured me for 2 months!  

It was the season when I visited Microsoft in Redmond, Washington that totally changed my mind on career progression in IT. No offence to Microsoft fans, but the expressionless, technical geeks at work really freaked me out. I did not regret, on the other hand I am extremely glad that the opportunity had made me discover my true interest. Nevertheless, I love the colours of fall in Washington. Aren’t they lovely!  

After all the “fun and games”, it was miraculous that we managed to get through the trying times with endless constraints. It makes me believe that we as humans can always survive challenges when the time comes and should not let fear or doubts hinder us from progressing. Every encounter will definitely have its own risks and if we do not try, we would never know the outcome. Its just part of life, isn’t it? Most importantly, we get to cherish and learn from the process – mel.

I was reading one of the employee’s (Vietnamese) biography in my workplace and she mentioned an apparent difference between East and West is punctuality. Indeed! In KL, everyone is always late for everything including meetings, appointments, dates, the typical Chinese weddings, you name it. This is because in the West, time is perceived as linear, in Asia, it is seen as cyclical hmmmm.

Since I’m a typical Asian, I am not exempted from being on time. Although my lateness is often excused coz it’s usually in the 5-10 min range, but late is still late. I realised that a lot can be gained even in a mere 5 minutes especially in meetings. It might not mean a lot to me but it may mean a lot and precious to others. Now it’s not just starting on time but also ending on time. A common example is again meetings. In the west, 1 hr = 1 hr or less. In the east, 1 hr = 1 hour or more (usually the latter). I am of course being brought up in the Eastern culture, so working with a different culture to cover all agendas efficiently within a scheduled time frame and the capability to prioritise discussions spontaneously have always been challenging but it’s definitely more productive and beneficial. At least I know that I do not need to reschedule my subsequent plans. That’s why people in the West tend to leave work on time because everything usually works according to plan and besides, there is no time to waste for personal activities. In short, they have life lah! But there are no ‘tani’ (yum char/coffee) or ‘pat’ (chit chat) sessions during office hours..ha ha…how boring. However, it takes all relevant parties to make punctuality a success but if it’s already embedded deep within our roots, it is almost impossible to change. After all, that’s what it takes to form a culture - mel.

Throughout my experiences working on multiple projects and teams, I’ve never come across working with such a unified group of great individuals. So much so that we all tend to get passionate and emotional over the project. However good it gets, all good things must come to an end one day. Political stir can really drive you nuts and that’s one of the main reasons most of the “old” members are leaving. No one has the continuing energy to thrive from being manipulated. However, the advantage is such mess reveals the true colours of individuals and I respect the fact that the team including the PM is so strong and handled every issue with dignity. I always believe that these are the people who will endure trying times without lingering guilt. So, who says everyone needs to wear a mask for a rice bowl? But I guess it’s also fair to say that people will react and decide to behave differently in vary circumstances as no 2 souls on earth will be in the exact position. Contradicting myself huh? I do that all the time as I always try to think from reverse perspective. I will be next in the line to dash. I’ve frozen my travels for a period of time and I’m so pleased that I’m fulfilling my intentions and being firm and insistent (well, not that I’m a YES person all this while)..yeah! - mel.

Came across these role-plays with a distinct sense of deja vu. All I know is true friends encourage and share the joys of their mates.
 
Scene A Average Joe has been working on the same project for 5 years and is looking to move on to a new role. He has been promoted a year ago. He is pretty much tired of the current project and is stagnant in terms of career advancement. However, the project is in a bad shape and most of his teammates are looking forward to leave too. R2D2 is not the aggressive kind, though complains all the time.
Average Joe: My last day for the current project is end of August 2020.
R2D2 : So lucky you. Can escape easily.
Average Joe : Might sound easy to you but I went through hell lots of disagreement with the top.
R2D2 : Still consider lucky lah since it was the project that justified your promotion.
Big Mouth – There is no hard and fast rule that after that promotion, Average Joe needs to serve the same project/company till death. Average Joe fought hard to get what he wanted; a promotion and the move to a new role and should not be penalized with sarcasm just because R2D2 is wishy-washy.
 
Scene B ET has just broke off from a relationship and is a believer of the Sex and the City lifestyle and is keeping herself busy with work. At the same time, her best friend just got engaged and is living with his partner.
ET : You happy or not?
Average Joe : Of course I am! Check out my blog.
ET : Gosh, you really have that much time to do these kinda things huh ?
Big Mouth – Blogging is a valuable activity to some people as it helps to record thoughts for future references. Anyway, life is not just about being in a rat-race but it’s also about investing ways in self-reflection and development. At the end of the day, what you bring to life after retirement is priceless learning of quality living; not achievement from work (well maybe lots of money…but can money alone buy happiness?). The root cause is purely lack of effective time management.

We have so many good things to share and I guess it is more fun to do it in stride. Best news for me till today is mum’s constant dizziness has subsided a little, though a LITTLE but it is an improvement at least. The least, she doesn’t need to suffer intensive pain and is in better hope. It is never easy to deal and cope with people, especially loved ones who are succumb by illnesses. Since young, I’ve had close encounter with suffering patients; late-grandpa for 3 years, then late-grandma for 5 years, myself and now mum. All these life testimonies alert me that well-being and health are crucial to lead a meaningful life. Our Lady plays an important role to mum’s recovery as she is such a stress reliever, keeps mum busy and a darling to every member of the family. She definitely works better than me! Although my parents and us are miles apart but regular and consistent distant communication enhance our relationship in this instance. It makes us appreciate each other even more. Of course not every family needs to go through this for self-realisation……it all depends - mel.

It had been a tiring 2005. I’ve been traveling since Jan then for at least 1-2 weeks a month and some were connecting flights from one destination to another - east to west to east. I could feel myself getting older as I could no longer cope with the jet lag and recuperation takes a longer duration. By the time I get adjusted to a timezone, it would be time for me to fly home. There were also various occasions where I would arrived at the destination at 6am, freshened up and headed straight to the office and worked till 10pm at night. I’m not the only pathetic person in the world but my colleagues do that too and I salute them for being able to cope with all that stress. Anyway, I’ve finally informed my managers that I could no longer travel and this KL trip would be my last. Some are pretty supportive but some are trying to negotiate a 30% traveling requirement with me. So I guess at the end of the day, it depends on how unyielding I am to accommodate such request in the imminent future although I am adamant with my decision at this point. I’m sure a lot of you have been in such situation when it comes to work and have to compensate for a fulfilling career but offload personal desire and probably work-life balance - mel.

2 days ago, I was sharing about how fortunate everyone is. We should always make the best out of our life if things are within our control unless one day, God has decided to call us home without prior "notice". I’ve been working on a project for the past 1 year and it has not been a bed of roses with many challenges, obstacles, chaos, resignations, stress and illnesses and what could be worse than a sudden bereavement of an invaluable manager - a leader whom we all looked up to. Yesterday was the worst day in the history of our professional life. She collapsed in the office and passed away so suddenly that no one till this moment as I write could accept the reality. When I first joined the organization as a contrator, we had our first team dinner together at Chillis BSC and I remembered her chatting endlessly with us in the interest of wanting to know the new joiners better. Subsequently, she moved on to different roles and finally landed in our project again to be our new boss. She was a gutsy woman and lead in steering directions within the project and corporation. She rewarded praises and appreciation when recognition was due. A leader, an employee, a wife, a mother, a daughter whom anyone could have ever wanted. The morale is still low but it’s nothing compared with the grief of her immediate family and friends. However, it has impact us all in some way or the other and through this incident, she had taught us all an important and priceless lesson once again - pursue a work life balance, to value life and spend quality time with loved ones. Personally, although I was not present at the scene but it had shaken me. I was due to meet her next week in KL for advise and discussions. I’m seriously reconsidering my working lifestyle and heavy travels. I’ve been through it all but what further benefits can it bring? Possibly more money and promotion but I would rather not trade those for my health if the journey is gonna take a while….. If there is only something we could all do. Readers, treat this as a wake-up call and be responsible with your own life as it’s not governed by your company nor obligated to the company. Don’t just say it but do it! Learn to say NO if things are hitting beyond your limit…Our deepest sympathy and condolences to her family and may God let her rest in peace.

That’s the topic presented by the church speaker today. The speaker emphasized that most people fear on how others think of them and as a result, they often put on masks in order to paint a beautiful picture to others. This would probably win attention and caused others to be impressed but will definitely not gain genuine friendship, sincerity and honesty and would only bring dissapointment in the long run.  But I guess everyone has to find their ‘anchor’, something or someone that an individual can trust so that it would become the support and motivation throughout life. Do not let fear stop you as that would only prevent you from progressing. Instead, think of what you fear most and what’s your anchor to help you get on with life - mel.